I'm going to tell you a secret. But first, let me take a selfie.
Just kidding. (Although I do love selfies. Don't look through the camera roll on my phone. It's embarrassing.)
First, let me say that I, just like many other people I know, have dreams. I have aspirations. I have goals. And if you're a breathing human being, you probably do, too.
The depressing part of this statement is that many of these dreams and goals have been swirling around in my head for months, sometimes years. (Let's not talk about my goal of working out in only a sports bra and shorts - that one's been on the list since I was about 15. Vain? Yes. Don't judge me.)
There have been other things on my list throughout the years, too; some have been short term and some longer term. Some serious (like getting married or buying a house) and some a little more silly (like growing my hair out or fitting back into my high school jeans). But there are a lot of things that I've kept in the back of my mind for quite some time now, and I just can't seem to get the wheels turning.
I thought about these things for a while. For a long time I just kept telling myself, you must not want it badly enough. After all, isn't that often the case? We have the power to make things happen, but we never get that spark to ignite?
But I realized something else, something a little more scary than just lack of desire.
And here is my secret: I am afraid. I am immensely and intensely afraid.
I'm afraid of what could happen if I do step outside my comfort zone and pursue things in the unknown. I'm afraid of what people will think of me. I'm afraid that people won't believe in me. I'm afraid of the discipline and the time commitment required for success. And most importantly, I realized I'm afraid of failure.
I've always been kind of an "all or nothing" type of person. If I can't do it perfectly, what's the point? If I'm not going to succeed right away, why should I try?
This type of thinking is pretty toxic - and can lead to some really dark places. So I'm trying to put a new spin on it.
I'm afraid of what could happen if I do step outside my comfort zone and pursue things in the unknown. Nothing great ever happened inside my comfort zone.
I'm afraid of what people will think of me. Since when did you worry about what other people thought?
I'm afraid that people won't believe in me. Believe in yourself. They'll believe in you, too.
I'm afraid of the discipline and the time commitment required for success.
In the (oh so grammatically correct) words of Beyonce: a little sweat ain't never hurt nobody.
And most importantly, I realized I'm afraid of failure. Failure is the key to success if we learn from it.
What I've learned from my past is that I start something, and then quit once I lose momentum or don't succeed right away. The weight of my failures - the things I've quit - weighs heavy on me. It bothers me that I haven't seen things through to the end. And what have I learned from that? Well, things take time. They take work. They take consistency.
So am I gonna go out there today and start *crushing* my dreams? Well, maybe not all at once. But I do know for sure that I am ready to start conquering my fears. It's time to set some clear goals, with benchmarks along the way. It's time to set a plan. It's time to work.
And it's time to release my inner Wonder Woman.
Who's with me?
